my dreams...

everything before this point is pretty much verbatim copy and pasted from discord messages i sent right after waking up since ive never kept a proper dream journal, but i do have a channel in my server for dreams, hence the writing quality lol

12/04/25
i cosplayed emily class of 09 for halloween for some reason except my subconscious kept thinking she had blue hair or smth so my wig kept changing colors and i like. in the dream. didnt know wtf was going on and i was having a mental breakdown over it. the wig started normal and then it had like a streak like at the bottom of the bangs that was black and pink and that was rly cute. and then it had raccoon tails and that was fine.and then it was like a dark blue with light blue underneath with the pink part also and iwl. thats not right why is it like this thats not how its supposed to be and i couldnt even remember what character it was bc thats nothing. and i was frantically googling blue hair class of 09 character bc iwl well it probably something i probably just forgot and my partner was like noo ur right thats a real character that exists. and then i woke up and did the same thing and its definitely not a character. now that i think abt it thats the first dream where ive used my phone i think

09/16/25
the other night i dreamt i was at this mall but i dont think it was mallworld it was smaller and different but it was june and they were having like pride events and there was like a lesbian group showing of but im a cheerleader and i tried to go bc i love that movie and everyone was really mean and kicked me out and i was rly confused and was like why cant i watch the movie and they were like well look at you. you dont exactly fit in . and then i woke up and was like ohhh im a cis man that makes sense and then i woke up for real and was like what no im not

09/02/25
it was like mallworld but not really it was like if this one server in particular was a mall i think and there was a like coaster ride that went through a bunch of really dead memes like it kinda felt like a sbahj comic except it was also like completely infested with spiders like to the point there would just be piles of them everywhere. thousands and thousands of them. and i asked someone why they dont do smth sbt them and my friend got mad and yelled at me about how important they are
there was another like . activity room thing where it was like a big trampoline on half and then like a ball pit on the other half but it was like literally just one layer of balls not a pit and someone went in after i left and took all the balls out. so when i was like man that ballpit fucking sucked and then went back in there i just looked crazy. and also tbis guy i got in a discord drama in like 3 years ago and then sent goatse to and got accused of that being sexual assault was there

08/19/25
i mailed my friend suvi a rice cooker? there was more context but idr. except also it was halloween or smth and suvi was there. the prophecy.
holeween and we were all there and there was also a haunted doll and we mailed a rice cooker to suvis house despite her being there.

context: suvi lives in finland, and holeween is what we call my friend group's yearly halloween meetup, since our server is called the hole. we were trying to get her to come but obv thats a lot to travel. but my prophecy was true and she ended up making it for last halloween! did not mail her a rice cooker though and there was no hauntings

08/18/25
i dreamt that like i was in downtown [hometown] and there was an active shooter just rampaging the whole downtown area (not very big like a couple blocks of two streets basically) and i kept having to corral people back to my dads apartment to safety and then i got knighted on the roof or something

08/17/25
post work nap gave me weird dreams that had to have been pulling from when i went to the kitty ray shroom dimension or something. kitty was there and also fortnite. but it was like it started with kitty had this art installation ? or something? where you walk through this old kinda scary looking falling apart house but in the walls there was like little cubbies and compartment room type things and each one was filled or like lined with different bed sets basically. so like a lot of blankets and pillows and you could get in and chill. and this was on loop the whole time you were inside:

and then i went to her apartment and she made me instant noodles and we watched some bad sitcom like new girl or something. but then also there was a new fortnite map except it was a new thing called fortnite Globe where it actually worked like a globe not like a flat surface. it was like this except there was another one inside

and one half was like . clean and nice and mostly water and you could dive down and swim around and then the other half was like a garbage dump and had gross green water and the polluted half would like pour through the holes and get in the nice side and you had to stop it or something

07/30/25
woke up at like 6 and i was so ready to have a nice morning to myself to get some things done before work and then fell back asleep like an hour later and dreamt that someone in here gave like everyone in the server mod and everyone gaslit me about it like no weve always had like 30 people with mod role wdym. and then later maybe a seperate dream i was in like a hospital or like a group home type of thing dying my hair in the bathroom and there was this old lady that kept asking me so many questions about my life but my hair turned out rly cool it was like way longer than it is rn and i did it all rainbowy.
and then i woke up at precisely 10:58 am and my shift started at 11

06/29/25
just got off work after my week and was so excited bc i have the new two days off and i can now relax. i got a matcha latte and a strawberry cheesecake croissant and curled up to play roblox and ended up falling asleep all warm and comfy with my cat . this isnt the part of the dream but its important for context i think. immediately dreamt that i was at this like big event w my partner idk what it was exactly like a festival of some sort and i got rly drunk and we got separated and they got rly mad at me for getting lost and just left me there. and some guy started talking to me bc he was “worried” and basically just took me home to force me to sleep w him. woke up w my phone dead (in the dream) in his basement and found a phone charger and plugged it in and was trying to get ahold of my partner because i was really scared and needed to figure out how to get home. and theyd like blocked me and kept unblocking me to reply like once and then reblock me most of the time and i was just trying to figure out how to get home but then i like asked one of our other friends wtf was going on and they were like yeah idk theyre like having a crisis abt being in love with someone else and not you and they dont know if he likes them back. and then i found out the guy i was with working for the same awful company i do and we had to go there right now. and then i woke up sweaty. hell world hell world hell world. i think the guy that like def assaulted me helped me chase down an unrelated ex bc i saw him there and we like threw drinks on him or smth and that was funny at least there was that

06/26/25
i asked my friend abt their cat shrimp and he said he changed her name and refused to tell me what he changed it to and every time i called her shrimp he got mad at me and gaslit me

06/06/25
dreamt i was dating someone that looked like the good doctor except it wasnt him but it was

05/29/25
last night i dreamt i accidentally had to kill my dad in the woods i dont remember what the context was but it was like. i had to sacrifice him to escape something bad. but he died and i didnt know what to do bc there was a body in the woods near my house and it was my fault and also its my fucking dad so like . i panicked and skipped town and it was a really tumultuous decision to abandon my whole life and everyone i knew in order to keep a low profile and go completely awol i couldnt say anything to anyone i just had to disappear. even had to leave my cat behind with my roommate but it was specifically not even the cat i have now it was my first cat who died and that was the most emotional part of leaving. but i knew i had to leave anyways so i did and i hopped freight trains and rode greyhounds and stayed in homeless shelters and just as i felt like i was done running and wasnt being tracked down anymore and reached out to someone i knew before i left i woke up

04/28/25
earlier today i had a dream that was like some house of leaves type shit except it was in a subway ive only been to once and i kept getting lost bc every time id go to the back thered be a new like open storage type area and it just kept getting bigger and then i came home and my roommate kept taking furniture out of the living room and when i asked abt it they kept insisting like we never even had a tv in the first place. just straight gaslighting me. except every time i have a dream where im like at home, i know intrinsically its supposed to be home but its not actually like where i live except this time both this subway and our apartment was so vividly accurate it was weird. also right before i woke up i was sitting on the living room floor w tsuki and playing with her and she suddenly turned and stared down the hallway and growling and getting all weird and i was sitting more towards the tv so i couldnt see down the hall but tsuki definitely saw something so i got up to peek around the corner and i was really scared and then i woke up right as i moved past the wall. not foreboding at all !
also my roommate invited me to a destroy boys/jeff rosenstock/some other band that didnt rly match the vibe show and iwl. insane but ok destroy boys opening for jeff rly funny when will this be real

my roommate: the most inaccurate part of the dream is me moving furniture. too much work

it wasnt even the actual furniture it was just everything on the tv wall, u could easily move the tv and the keyboard and ur records if u tried. its the fact u were so insistent like no. nothings ever been against that wall. and iwl u mean to tell me we have a couch set up facing a blank wall. and u were just like. yeah?

04/03/25
dreamt i was in like a bandori core girl band and i wasnt even the fucking pink one. i had a sparkly purple 7? string bass and we played a show in the warped tour parking lot bc they wouldnt book us

02/24/25
accidentally fell asleep on the couch and had an actual fever dream abt getting cancelled for the most insane reason basically it was for liking one brand new song and these ppl from my hometown music scene kidnapped and tortured me and made up a rly complex web of lies to make everyone ik hate me and also stole tsuki and did all this awful shit to me over liking One brand new song. felt like my dreams when i was on lexapro.

01/08/25
my partner and my friend jade and i were all being chased by a killer dbd style but it was this like weird mall with puzzles the only part i rly remember was this like tunnel area that was made of like plush cushions we had to rearrange and burrow in to hide. and then we got out and it was christmas and charlies dream realm mom or smth made us all a nice dinner on fancy dishes we got to keep as a gift except there was pho with it and i just had to eat it anyways bc i didnt wanna be rude and i kept thinking wow this is just like that weezer song where he does that. and then jade went home and me and charlie went to like fucked up dream realm universal or something. it was set up like a theme park kinda thing except it wasnt. but we got like a hibachi style dinner and they projected stuff to watch on the ceiling above you and it was smth crazy but i forgot what it was <\3 and then we walked around and we were at this zoo type part except instead of actual animals they they had a hologram of every animal and bug in alphabetical order swarming you directly. and then i woke up

12/11/24
napped and dreamt that i had tsukis whole family except she had a orange cat brother and her mom was like. an espeon. she was like the lightest purple like white but slightly tinted purple and her belly was brown and she had darker purple eyes but other than that she was like a normal cat not exactly an espeon but she looked like it. she kinda looked like a moth. i wish she was real.

10/18/24
dreamt i was in chainsaw man except we were like running from the feds or smth and also kanye west and my mom were there. died at some point and then just started spectating denjis pov and im choosing to believe thats how it worked out in canon also.

08/03/24
went to middle school with my friend charm specifically but i think most of my friends. there was more going on and it was weirder but like the only thing i specifically remember is being in a middle school lunch with people but charm was there and we were talking abt judaism. the only other thing i remembered from my dream was i lived with my cousin fsr, it was raining and she had a bird in her room and i could see her window from my room somehow and i just saw her like open the window and hold an umbrella out of it so she could lean out and release this bird she caught with. her bare hands apparently. and she let it go and it flew out from under the umbrella and got all wet and just fell to the ground and iwjl . you dumb bitch.

07/21/24
dreamt i started trafficking ket

someone: a sign?

maybe

04/11/24
guys i had a dream we snuck into the most insane concert ever we were like at some event or insane con or smth but part of it was like they had shows all day in a seperate building and we went over for . mitski, ptv, and cheekface . in that order. i didnt even make it to dreamscape cheekface concert bc king for a day got me so excited i woke up sweaty :(

this was my first mallworld dream, or at least one of the first, but i didnt know what it was yet. but the room the concert took place in was a HUGE theatre, almost like a stadium type venue but the chairs and stage and everything were definitely more reminiscent of like, a theatre for plays. which other people have talked about wrt mallworld, which is crazy bc i didnt even know mallworld was a thing when i had this dream